Knotty play is an artform and psychological test of D/s interaction.

Entwined

One form of kink I’ve been researching lately is Shibari. The ancient Japanese art of using lengths of rope to bind a person with intricate knot-work and /or for restraining purposes. Shibari literally means ‘to tie.’ It originated from the Japanese police and Samurai in the period 1400-1700. Initially a form of restraint for prisoners, it was derived from the martial art Hojo-jutsu. In the 1800s, Kinbaku, an erotic form of the practice became prevalent*. Shibari is now commonly used to describe the practice of BD/SM rope play.

What interests and excites me about the practice is that it:

A. Looks fricking awesome. The patterns that can be achieved are stunning. They are works of art in themselves on a human ‘canvas’ using rope as the ‘media’. Shibari is highly ornamental, as well as functional.

B. It involves a strong element of trust. Both from the person tying the knots, and the individual being tied. The person tying the rope  (known as the ‘rigger’) is putting their faith in their bound partner to tell them how they are feeling during the process. The person who is ‘laced up’ is trusting the Shibari practitioner. The latter needs to find out if any of the ties are uncomfortable, the rope chafes or if the position is putting too much strain on muscles.

C. The pleasure derived both from seeing the handiwork and the feeling of the rope lying on the flesh. Not only this, the psychological element of submission. The person who is bound submits themselves physically and psychologically to the Rope Master or Mistress.

Practicali-ties

The ropes are strategically placed and knotted to stimulate pressure points. A Shiatsu massage effect can be attained with some bindings. Moreover, the use of additional play equipment (floggers, paddles, vibrators among others) can increase the sensation felt by the person being bound.


Ropes that are used are commonly 5-10 metres in length, red /black/ or natural in colour. Composition of the rope is important as the fibres need to be supple and flexible enough to allow manipulation and formation of neat knots. The rope also needs to be strong; its purpose is, in addition to looking attractive, to restrain. It needs durability and to not wear excessively under strain.

Another consideration is the comfort of the individuals tying the knots and being bound. Rope-burns are not at all pleasant. Neither are they attractive. No one wants to go to the office on a Monday morning with tell-tale red marks on their limbs. That would make for awkward water cooler conversation. Elastic should not be contained in the fibres as it can make knots too tight, and trickier to undo.

Materials that tend to be used are cotton, hemp and silk. Cotton is relatively inexpensive, whilst silk is more luxurious. Both are exceedingly strong.Having the appropriate material ensures the rope-work will appear neat and well-placed (this will also depend on the skill of the Shibari practitioner).

Creating the ‘illusion’ means practice

It takes hours of patience and skill to learn to manipulate the ropes. An important feature of bindings is that they’re readily released. Meaning, as the quick-release mechanism on a bicycle saddle makes it easy to adjust the saddle’s height, so the binding of the rope ensures it is readily unbinding. If a restraint position is causing too much discomfort, or the psychological effect on the binder/ recipient is too extreme, the ropes need to be unwound quickly. This means there are not actual ‘knots’ in the rope, but the illusion of knots in some cases.

The person being bound needs to have patience too, as it can be a time- consuming art-form. The aesthetic makes it entirely worth the wait. They say a pictures speaks a thousand words. Shibari makes you feel those words…

How does Shibari make you feel? Please comment, and see if we can reach 1000 words!

* this information was accessed from Kinkly.com on 18th June 2017

 

Sinful Sunday, Week 323

17th June 2017

This photo is a close up of one of my recent favourite toys, the pastel pink Ambit from Godemiche!

It was taken in the warm-up to an intense play time. I love the gorgeous pink of this toy, and I love the smooth silicone, and that bulbous g spot targeting head…


Because the above image wasn’t outdoors, I’ve included a second one that is most definitely outdoors and features a delightful bloom of summer poppies.


Click the lips to see who else is being Sinful this Sunday!

New Pleasure Panel Reviews! 

Lovehoney Oh! Hot Massage Rocks

Give your lover a sensual hot stone massage, for a romantic treat!

Fetish Fantasy Gold pinwheel

Pipedream’s version of a sensation play /BDSM toy. How does it fare under Bunny’s scrutinising and testing? Click the link to find out!

Should I buy pre-loved sex toys?

One careful lady owner

In this materialistic, consumerist world, it seems like most things we buy these days are disposable. Or at some point, destined for a charity bag.

Why should sex toys be any different? I mean, why spend hundreds or even thousands of pounds on brand new ones that may not even work for you? For some toys that are non-porous, body-safe, and in perfect working order, it seems crazy to just send them to the Rabbit Amnesty. Unless they’re so dire not even a buzzy pink vibe-lover would like it…

So, I’m thinking, I’d like to share the joy these toys can bring. My expanding collection needs a makeover. I don’t have endless storage to keep the items I once enjoyed, but now something better is occupying my bedside drawer.

Silicone and glass are perfectly safe (in my opinion) to pass on, as long as they are thoroughly cleaned. Like, boiled or bleached. Porous materials like jelly rubber I’d say hell no, but then why would you want to buy that crap anyway? Jelly is just for eating in my view!

I have some items I’m clearing out. They work fine, but they’re just not for me anymore. They’ve been well looked after, and I’d love for them to find a new home with owners who’ll have as much pleasure with them as they can bring. Toys make life so much more fun!

Use it or lose it…Grey Matter

Muscle versus brawn

Becoming a parent and responsible-ish adult has been a game-changer for my life in general and it has also affected my mind a lot too. I still get anxious at times, and now for more valid reasons.

Will my daughter develop and learn well? Is she safe when she goes to pre-school and I’m not there? Is her home life giving her a stable up-bringing?

These are all concerns that whizz about my mind as well as all the other daily and short-to-mid term events that are going on in the back-ground. The problem is, our brains can only handle so much information at a time. Too much to think about inevitably makes us forget. Hopefully it’s only trivialities like putting the washing machine on before we leave the house in the morning, or missing the bread from the quick shopping trip.

The forgetful treadmill

I do feel though, that with the distractions from electronic devices and some degree of a lack of self-control, I get caught up in a cycle of not using my brain enough. The saying  ‘use is or lose it,’ and the Cockney Rhyming slang ‘Use your loaf,’ serve as important reminders to exercise our mental muscles. Whether that be memory or increasing our intelligence, both are important. A healthy mind, moreover, means a healthier body. I do not wish to age prematurely. The greys in my hair spring up and nag me that I’m not getting any younger. Aches and pains bleat out that my body needs strengthening and better suppleness.

We work out at the gym, or do exercise classes. For those who prefer team sports, there’s football, hockey. netball. Solo work-outs include running, cycling and swimming. I must admit, I’m not a fitness fanatic. I do enjoy my aerobics classes and Pilates. Walking is enjoyable too, in the right weather. But pounding a treadmill, or pavements is not me. I do not own a bicycle. But as long as I do some exercise at least several days a week I feel better. My mood lifts. I’m not as cranky, and I sleep well enough, providing I’m not too awake to sleep.

Brain Training

In terms of general memory, I’ve usually got a pretty good recall, particularly for numerical things like phone numbers. On occasion I have temporarily forgotten PIN numbers though; not helpful when standing at the point of sale at the services! This temporary lapse though seems to go hand-in-hand with anxiety, and in some ways its a useful marker telling me to take a step back and breathe.

 

Now, I’m half-way through this year (my first year blogging). My good intentions to stay ‘on top of the game’ have somewhat been absent-mindedly misplaced. I need to shake myself up, and give my brain a boost. One way of doing this is to take up cross-words. Not ‘damn!’ and ‘blast!’, but you know, those boxes that have clues to fill in with greyed out bits. I used to like doing ones in certain broadsheet papers. Not the cryptic… but the quick one. That is enough for my brain at present. Having left my ‘professional’ career as a scientist behind me 5 years ago, the brain of a part-time (was) housekeeper / sales advisor / full-time mum is currently feeling more colander-like than merely sieve-like.

Brain draining in progress…

Other productive past-times to boost the grey cells include learning languages. I did do a French course after leaving my science role, and I took some creative drawing classes. Both were enjoyable at the time. Drawing to some degree now is possible, though I don’t have the attention span and neither does my daughter, for me to be able to sit and produce anything artistically merit-worthy. It’d be more like doodling. I can teach my daughter basic French. It’s not very challenging for me, mentally though.

An alternative is re-teaching myself to play guitar. A recent Twitter chat reminded me how I used to like rocking out some riffs. Despite my plucking being a bit shoddy, I liked learning the chord shapes and trying out scales and arpeggios. Since I don’t read music I can get tabulature off the internet. Plenty of sites offer ‘tabs’ for free. Some are better than others, depending on the ability of the person who writes them (and their musical talent). It doesn’t have to necessarily be note perfect for playing along at home.

So between cross-words and re-learning guitar, I have a couple of options to build up my grey matter. My daughter’s brain is like a sponge, so I hope I can re-train mine to be less sieve-like and more sponge-like. If only I had remembered to buy the blasted paper to get the cross-words!

Sinful Sunday Week 322

June 11th 2017

I tried on these lacy crotchless panties with a corset to indulge myself on an occasion during the week. My toys and attire were colour-coordinated, and I love the pink/black combo. There’s something about it which reminds me of the movie Grease, which I first watched in the early ’90s as a pre-teen. It looked like a fab era to be alive, with so much post-WWII enthusiasm and the economy booming. Plus I had none of the worries of being a ‘responsible adult’ back then!

Click on the lips to see who else is taking part in Sinful Sunday…

Sinful Sunday 4th June 2017

The prompt Outdoor Photography inspired me to take a selfie whilst sunbathing. My skin is pale and smooth, and the clover in the grass beneath me cushions me like a mattress. If idleness is wicked, then I truly was for that luxurious hour in the sun…


Click the lips to see who else is being Sinful this Sunday…

Fleeting youth

On a stroll with my little Bunny I saw these pretty hedge roses (not sure if that’s the correct name for them, but who cares…)

They reminded me that our youth is gone in a flash, our once vibrant petals withered and falling away, to leave a seed husk that will hopefully promise more young budding life.