Knotty play is an artform and psychological test of D/s interaction.

Entwined

One form of kink I’ve been researching lately is Shibari. The ancient Japanese art of using lengths of rope to bind a person with intricate knot-work and /or for restraining purposes. Shibari literally means ‘to tie.’ It originated from the Japanese police and Samurai in the period 1400-1700. Initially a form of restraint for prisoners, it was derived from the martial art Hojo-jutsu. In the 1800s, Kinbaku, an erotic form of the practice became prevalent*. Shibari is now commonly used to describe the practice of BD/SM rope play.

What interests and excites me about the practice is that it:

A. Looks fricking awesome. The patterns that can be achieved are stunning. They are works of art in themselves on a human ‘canvas’ using rope as the ‘media’. Shibari is highly ornamental, as well as functional.

B. It involves a strong element of trust. Both from the person tying the knots, and the individual being tied. The person tying the rope  (known as the ‘rigger’) is putting their faith in their bound partner to tell them how they are feeling during the process. The person who is ‘laced up’ is trusting the Shibari practitioner. The latter needs to find out if any of the ties are uncomfortable, the rope chafes or if the position is putting too much strain on muscles.

C. The pleasure derived both from seeing the handiwork and the feeling of the rope lying on the flesh. Not only this, the psychological element of submission. The person who is bound submits themselves physically and psychologically to the Rope Master or Mistress.

Practicali-ties

The ropes are strategically placed and knotted to stimulate pressure points. A Shiatsu massage effect can be attained with some bindings. Moreover, the use of additional play equipment (floggers, paddles, vibrators among others) can increase the sensation felt by the person being bound.


Ropes that are used are commonly 5-10 metres in length, red /black/ or natural in colour. Composition of the rope is important as the fibres need to be supple and flexible enough to allow manipulation and formation of neat knots. The rope also needs to be strong; its purpose is, in addition to looking attractive, to restrain. It needs durability and to not wear excessively under strain.

Another consideration is the comfort of the individuals tying the knots and being bound. Rope-burns are not at all pleasant. Neither are they attractive. No one wants to go to the office on a Monday morning with tell-tale red marks on their limbs. That would make for awkward water cooler conversation. Elastic should not be contained in the fibres as it can make knots too tight, and trickier to undo.

Materials that tend to be used are cotton, hemp and silk. Cotton is relatively inexpensive, whilst silk is more luxurious. Both are exceedingly strong.Having the appropriate material ensures the rope-work will appear neat and well-placed (this will also depend on the skill of the Shibari practitioner).

Creating the ‘illusion’ means practice

It takes hours of patience and skill to learn to manipulate the ropes. An important feature of bindings is that they’re readily released. Meaning, as the quick-release mechanism on a bicycle saddle makes it easy to adjust the saddle’s height, so the binding of the rope ensures it is readily unbinding. If a restraint position is causing too much discomfort, or the psychological effect on the binder/ recipient is too extreme, the ropes need to be unwound quickly. This means there are not actual ‘knots’ in the rope, but the illusion of knots in some cases.

The person being bound needs to have patience too, as it can be a time- consuming art-form. The aesthetic makes it entirely worth the wait. They say a pictures speaks a thousand words. Shibari makes you feel those words…

How does Shibari make you feel? Please comment, and see if we can reach 1000 words!

* this information was accessed from Kinkly.com on 18th June 2017

 

Should I buy pre-loved sex toys?

One careful lady owner

In this materialistic, consumerist world, it seems like most things we buy these days are disposable. Or at some point, destined for a charity bag.

Why should sex toys be any different? I mean, why spend hundreds or even thousands of pounds on brand new ones that may not even work for you? For some toys that are non-porous, body-safe, and in perfect working order, it seems crazy to just send them to the Rabbit Amnesty. Unless they’re so dire not even a buzzy pink vibe-lover would like it…

So, I’m thinking, I’d like to share the joy these toys can bring. My expanding collection needs a makeover. I don’t have endless storage to keep the items I once enjoyed, but now something better is occupying my bedside drawer.

Silicone and glass are perfectly safe (in my opinion) to pass on, as long as they are thoroughly cleaned. Like, boiled or bleached. Porous materials like jelly rubber I’d say hell no, but then why would you want to buy that crap anyway? Jelly is just for eating in my view!

I have some items I’m clearing out. They work fine, but they’re just not for me anymore. They’ve been well looked after, and I’d love for them to find a new home with owners who’ll have as much pleasure with them as they can bring. Toys make life so much more fun!

Use it or lose it…Grey Matter

Muscle versus brawn

Becoming a parent and responsible-ish adult has been a game-changer for my life in general and it has also affected my mind a lot too. I still get anxious at times, and now for more valid reasons.

Will my daughter develop and learn well? Is she safe when she goes to pre-school and I’m not there? Is her home life giving her a stable up-bringing?

These are all concerns that whizz about my mind as well as all the other daily and short-to-mid term events that are going on in the back-ground. The problem is, our brains can only handle so much information at a time. Too much to think about inevitably makes us forget. Hopefully it’s only trivialities like putting the washing machine on before we leave the house in the morning, or missing the bread from the quick shopping trip.

The forgetful treadmill

I do feel though, that with the distractions from electronic devices and some degree of a lack of self-control, I get caught up in a cycle of not using my brain enough. The saying  ‘use is or lose it,’ and the Cockney Rhyming slang ‘Use your loaf,’ serve as important reminders to exercise our mental muscles. Whether that be memory or increasing our intelligence, both are important. A healthy mind, moreover, means a healthier body. I do not wish to age prematurely. The greys in my hair spring up and nag me that I’m not getting any younger. Aches and pains bleat out that my body needs strengthening and better suppleness.

We work out at the gym, or do exercise classes. For those who prefer team sports, there’s football, hockey. netball. Solo work-outs include running, cycling and swimming. I must admit, I’m not a fitness fanatic. I do enjoy my aerobics classes and Pilates. Walking is enjoyable too, in the right weather. But pounding a treadmill, or pavements is not me. I do not own a bicycle. But as long as I do some exercise at least several days a week I feel better. My mood lifts. I’m not as cranky, and I sleep well enough, providing I’m not too awake to sleep.

Brain Training

In terms of general memory, I’ve usually got a pretty good recall, particularly for numerical things like phone numbers. On occasion I have temporarily forgotten PIN numbers though; not helpful when standing at the point of sale at the services! This temporary lapse though seems to go hand-in-hand with anxiety, and in some ways its a useful marker telling me to take a step back and breathe.

 

Now, I’m half-way through this year (my first year blogging). My good intentions to stay ‘on top of the game’ have somewhat been absent-mindedly misplaced. I need to shake myself up, and give my brain a boost. One way of doing this is to take up cross-words. Not ‘damn!’ and ‘blast!’, but you know, those boxes that have clues to fill in with greyed out bits. I used to like doing ones in certain broadsheet papers. Not the cryptic… but the quick one. That is enough for my brain at present. Having left my ‘professional’ career as a scientist behind me 5 years ago, the brain of a part-time (was) housekeeper / sales advisor / full-time mum is currently feeling more colander-like than merely sieve-like.

Brain draining in progress…

Other productive past-times to boost the grey cells include learning languages. I did do a French course after leaving my science role, and I took some creative drawing classes. Both were enjoyable at the time. Drawing to some degree now is possible, though I don’t have the attention span and neither does my daughter, for me to be able to sit and produce anything artistically merit-worthy. It’d be more like doodling. I can teach my daughter basic French. It’s not very challenging for me, mentally though.

An alternative is re-teaching myself to play guitar. A recent Twitter chat reminded me how I used to like rocking out some riffs. Despite my plucking being a bit shoddy, I liked learning the chord shapes and trying out scales and arpeggios. Since I don’t read music I can get tabulature off the internet. Plenty of sites offer ‘tabs’ for free. Some are better than others, depending on the ability of the person who writes them (and their musical talent). It doesn’t have to necessarily be note perfect for playing along at home.

So between cross-words and re-learning guitar, I have a couple of options to build up my grey matter. My daughter’s brain is like a sponge, so I hope I can re-train mine to be less sieve-like and more sponge-like. If only I had remembered to buy the blasted paper to get the cross-words!

Fleeting youth

On a stroll with my little Bunny I saw these pretty hedge roses (not sure if that’s the correct name for them, but who cares…)

They reminded me that our youth is gone in a flash, our once vibrant petals withered and falling away, to leave a seed husk that will hopefully promise more young budding life.

That ‘stiff upper lip’ thing

Mental ‘health warning’

This post is being written because I, like a lot of other people out there, have suffered from a mental health condition. It still rears its ugly head at times though I manage it as best as I can through various means. Some of these have included ‘talking therapies,’ such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy*. Others include self-help such as exercise, hobbies and having fun events to look forward to. I’ve also used medication (yes, pills. Something I’d rather not take, but for fear of the alternative I have been reluctant to come off of them). My GP seems reluctant for me to wean off them completely. Cynics may argue that of course GPs want you to stay medicated as that is providing their pay-cheques. I’d also like to think that GPs have their patients’ best interests at heart too.

The conditions I’ve dealt with are anxiety and depression. The pair seem to go hand in hand. In my experience, they seem to flare up most profoundly at times that I feel overwhelmed, or under higher levels of stress. Of course, stress is a normal part of everyday life. It motivates us and gives us the incentive to get our work done and deal with the necessary daily/weekly/monthly chores in a timely manner. But when the stress becomes unmanageable, that’s when the self-doubt, helplessness and despair comes crashing over me like a tsunami-style tidal wave.

I am not alone in feeling like this. Lots of people experience these unsettling emotions. Maybe not necessarily to a degree that affects their life to an extent that they have to withdraw from a ‘normal’ existence for a couple of months. But enough to feel that they are merely surviving rather than necessarily living. Why do people get to such a despairing mode?

Nature vs Nurture

We are all born as unique individuals. We may be naturally ‘laid-back’ and easy- going in our characters. Little things might wash over us like water off the back of a duck. Some of us, conversely, may be more tightly-strung. At the right tension we work perfectly fine, like the strings on a musical instrument. When wound too tight, though, we are more prone to suffering high levels of anxiety. When these are exacerbated through experiences that life throws at us, we can essentially ‘break.’ Life experiences that can trigger a severely altered mood include

  • more demands at work.
  • a house move.
  • bereavement.
  • relationship breakdown.
  • money problems.
  • Other major life-changing event, e.g. becoming a parent.

In our upbringing, the behaviour and actions of our parents are those that we become acutely accustomed to. For most people, the personality traits they adopt as they mature will be inherited from their parents or caregivers. If a parent is overprotective and strict, this may lead to the child (and corresponding adolescent) to become cautious. In addition they potentially feel anxious about making mistakes for fear of criticism. A more relaxed and encouraging parent, on the other hand, will inspire more confidence in their children. The child/ren will feel more comfortable with trying new activities and set-backs won’t be feared to the same extent as for a more ‘sensitive’ individual. This is not just about how parenting affects our predisposition to suffering mental health conditions. As an individual I need to accept responsibility for my innate ‘limitations’ that also helped contribute to my illness.

Keeping up with the Jones’s

In this ever-changing world, we are bombarded with media that projects success as having the latest commodities and devices, as well as having immaculate ‘show’ homes and new cars. In addition, professional careers are seen as the way to be ‘upstanding citizens’ in society. Having had a more professional career, as a scientific research assistant, and now currently being in a low-paid ‘unskilled’ role, I can honestly say I pretty much feel the same way about myself in either situation. A lot of the way I feel stems from lower self-esteem. As a fairly introverted person, I was fairly studious though not naturally academically accomplished. I got good GCSES, followed by A-levels, and subsequently a Batchelor’s degree in a biological science. It was an achievement for me to come out of University and enter my first ‘proper job.’ More so since at one point in my A-levels during a ‘wobbly’ period, I was told that I ‘wouldn’t be able to cope with going to University.’ Getting that finely-pressed and crested paper certificate sure showed them!

But just getting a degree doesn’t seem to be enough. We are told we need to get further degrees or doctorates to progress up the career ladder. Extracurricular activities such as sports, music and volunteering are touted as being Curriculum Vitae essentials as well. Now, I’m all for bettering myself, learning new skills and taking up new hobbies / interests. But there needs to be balance. It’s not necessarily going to be of benefit to become a semi-professional dancer if the money you need for lessons is competing for more essential items such as housing costs and nutritional food.

Be more realistic instead of materialistic

In more recent years, I’ve learnt to settle for less. Financially in terms of income, and materially. I have bought quite a few sex toys (*okay lots of sex toys*, and lingerie too). But I rarely spend the full RRP on items that I buy. Some items are testers, so they have been free in exchange for a review. More expensive items I have purchased only when heavily discounted. Moreover, we don’t go out as much as we used to or have as expensive holidays. This has had more to do with parenting responsibilities though, and the expense of childcare / overseas travel.

Being more realistic extends to what I can reasonably accomplish in a given timeframe. Since I tend to overthink, I sometimes may take a bit longer to get started on a task. Not only that but I sometimes underestimate how much time I will need to complete something. I’ve attempted to manage mine (and other people’s) expectations. This helps avoid disappointment plus associated ‘knocks’ to my confidence. Challenging Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTS)* is a practice I frequently go back to. In times of feeling overwhelmed it’s easy to become blinkered by ‘black and white’ / all-or-nothing thinking patterns. These do nothing to help a situation, instead they paralyse us into a sense of inadequacy and indecision. I reason with myself that a decision is better than no decision. As long as I’ve considered it from as many angles as possible then I’ll ‘cross that bridge’ if and when I get to it.

This is becoming a longer post than I anticipated. To prevent myself procrastinating and worrying if what I’ve written is ‘good enough’ I will throw caution to the wind (for a change) and hit publish! Please feel free to comment if you have had similar experiences, or if you want to discuss any of the content in more depth.

I may not wish to go into all the details of my own depressive episodes, so please respect that, but I may be able to offer some advice.


*Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) and Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTS) are only mentioned briefly in this post. If feedback from readers suggests that further discussion of this type of therapy is warranted, I will write more in a future post.

Labels

This is a random topic, and why am I writing about labels on a sex toy reviews and erotic fiction blog, I hear you ask… Because labels are everywhere. From the clothes we buy, the sticky ones we wear identifying ourselves in a workshop and so on. So it makes me think, what do labels do for us? Besides giving us information about a product or a brand name, or putting an occupation alongside our name to ‘define’ what we do?

So yeah, they’re clothes labels but if you’re stuck in a rut, a ‘new look’ may be what you need…

The answer is simple, they don’t really do a lot for us. So you might feel more ‘put together’ when you’re wearing your best suit tailored by your favourite designer. But take off that suit and you’re still you. Is a cleaner/janitor any less of a person because of what they do? Hell no. We are what we want to be essentially. Because at the end of the day actions speak louder than words.

And if we don’t like a label, what can we do then? We can change it for another! Whether you want a new career, status, religion or sexual orientation, life is fluid. If something isn’t working for you then ‘re-brand’ it, or do what the celebs do and re-invent yourself. Its not always easy, but its better than being in a situation that makes you unhappy or worse still, one that makes you feel ill or worthless.

So if the label fits and it makes you happy stick with it. Otherwise, try something different for size. You never know, you might like it. If you don’t you can always go back to what you were before.

And if anyone is wondering what my labels are, then you can find out here:

  • I’m a wife, mother, daughter, sister, aunt, cousin, niece and grand-daughter.
  • My day jobs are in the leisure and tourism industry. But I trained in a biological science background.
  • I like food, but I’m no fancy cook.
  • For me, my ideal holiday would be something cultural mixed in with some relaxation. Warm, sunny climates are my preference to colder ones.
  • My hobbies are keep-fit classes, walking, trying out new sex toys, and comedy movies. I also enjoy getting creative with my scrap booking stuff, to make memories.

 

 

Show Yourself Some Body Love

It is important for us to appreciate our own bodies; lumps, bumps, warts and all. Some brands have created body-positive marketing campaigns, for example, Dove. But in the adult industry it can be difficult sometimes to see that there is no ‘normal’ body; male or female. This article will hopefully encourage readers to ‘show yourself some body love.’

We all have body ‘hang-ups,’ whether we’re confident extroverts or shy introverts. Whenever we get naked in front of a partner, we think “do I look attractive enough?” These thoughts can be useful at times, in motivating us to change things we’re not quite happy with. Our diet and exercise regime frequently need checking, to improve our fitness, muscle tone and skin clarity. However, these thoughts can become more intrusive and in some cases, quite damaging.

Stereotypes

As I’ve mentioned, the adult industry has a lot to answer for in creating stereotypes of designer bodies in a sexual context. Women have ‘neat, flesh-coloured labia that blend in with the rest of their skin tone and don’t protrude excessively. Men have well-endowed, substantially girthed penises that don’t have excessive foreskin or non-retractable foreskin (a condition known as phimosis). We are bombarded with these images in adult entertainment and media, as well as on social media platforms. This can create a great deal of anxiety in some women and men, particularly younger ones who are discovering their sexuality. Generally, they are also more likely to make comparisons with and among their peers.

In an age of image-consciousness, cosmetic ‘enhancements’ are becoming more common. In the adult industry this has led to increasing pressure for actresses to have surgery to appear more ‘attractive’ sexually. Procedures such as labiaplasty are being undergone. The consequences being that members of the general public are seeing these operations being touted as life-changing ‘super-cures.’ It seems like people are unable to accept that there is no ‘normal’ in terms of how we appear, whether sexually or otherwise. We all have unique anatomical differences, and our genitalia is no exception to this. Projects such as the Great Wall of Vagina are helping raise awareness that all of us are different; they empower us to embrace our uniqueness rather than trying to change our appearance to fit in with media-projected stereotypes. More work like this is needed to help us show ourselves ‘body love.’

Lose your ‘hang-ups’ to get close-up and personal

Next time you are about to undress in front of your partner, whether you’ve been with them a long or short time, don’t question whether your breasts will appear lopsided or asymmetrical. Forget about the curve in your penis. Never mind that your labia protrude; your partner will have more to play with! If you have a longer foreskin, fret not! Just cast your clothes and your body ‘hang-ups’ over the side of the bed, and focus on having fun together!

 

Almost 3 months of blogging- reflections on Down the Bunny Rabbit Hole

bigstock-blog-icon-10617698.jpg

I purchased my domain name www.downthebunnyrabbithole.com through Bluehost on 3rd December 2016. I wanted a place I could share sex toy reviews, some erotic fiction and my own personal thoughts and perspectives. I’m interested in sexual issues ranging from health and satisfaction through to what ‘kinks’ can be enjoyed whether you’re a traditional ‘vanilla’ lover dipping your toe, or a seasoned ‘kinkster’. And then pretty much anything and everything in between!

I’m writing this post because I recently saw Aurora Glory’s post on her first three months of blogging. It made me stop and realise that I am fast approaching this milestone. With my Dory-like memory I decided I’d benefit from writing a similar post to reflect on what has gone well and what hasn’t. I also want to try and fathom the direction I’d like to take this blog in the future, and to some extent that will depend what my readers wish to see. My plan is still to write reviews for adult products, including toys and lingerie. But I want to make my reviews as useful to the readers as I possibly can. Having looked at fellow bloggers sites, I can see I need to include ratings systems to make my reviews more ‘user-friendly.’

Customising the site

I had no idea what theme to use, so I went with a WordPress 2015 theme as it looked neat and tidy, with the menu sited on the left-hand side of the screen. But when I wanted to design a Header (something I tried to do using PowerPoint initially- *cringe*) it was kindly pointed out to me by @Throbinhood68 that the theme wouldn’t support a Header. I then changed it to the 2016 theme- I’m not as keen on it aesthetically but I like that it enables my Header to be displayed.

The Header itself was a learning curve- I knew I wanted to do something related to Alice in Wonderland to fit in with the “DowntheBunnyRabbitHole” theme. After creating the sex-toy inspired Header on my Twitter account, I knew I wanted this to feature on my blog. To get it into a suitable format I used the Canva app (thanks for the recommendation Throbin), and hey presto, it worked!

Plugins are mind-scrambling

In terms of the technical ‘nitty-gritty’ of running the blog I must admit, I am still very much overwhelmed by all the jargon. I have installed plugins but not all of them are activated; perhaps fellow bloggers can enlighten me. Which of these plugins are essential and which are a ‘waste of time’ for a newbie such as myself?

  • Akismet -To protect blogs from spam – seems useful but I’ve not activated it yet as the instructions for signing up seemed confusing – API key, anyone?
  • Constant Contact Forms for WordPress – for email marketing – not sure as a ‘hobby blogger’ I need this? Perhaps better suited for businesses?
  • Header Customizer Lite – to customize your header through WordPress customizer. It doesn’t seem worth keeping this seeing as I’ve used Canva to design my header.
  • Hello Dolly – not sure what this does. Do I even need it?
  • Jetpack by WordPress.com – connects your blog to a WordPress.com account enabling use of features normally only available to WP users. Figured I needed this, though I didn’t really know why. But it seems useful for getting stats on visitors and page views.
  • OptinMonster APIUm, what does this do?
  • WPForms Lite – a beginner-friendly WP contact form plugin. I needed to create a Contact form in order to be able to open a Webgains account to become a Lovehoney affiliate (see more on affiliation with companies below). I’ve actually ended up creating two ‘Contact Me’ forms on the blog site, but I was worried if I tried to delete one, I’d end up deleting both, *cringe.*

It is safe to say that I am a technophobe! I really need to increase my knowledge on how a blog works and the essential plugins needed to make it fully functional, reader-friendly, and interactive.

Getting Social

This leads me to say that I also need to improve my Social Media awareness. I use Twitter already to link with the blog, as well as chat to Lovehoney friends and other followers I’ve encountered along the way. For ages I kept my Twitter account locked, but it was pointed out to me, that this would prevent a lot of companies from seeing what I was able to potentially offer them, as well as vice versa. So I amended that. As for the suggestion to go on Instagram, I’m still undecided as I feel I already spend lots of time on Twitter, so I don’t want to get overly distracted by social media. I may change my mind in the future…

The figures

Now its time for some numbers. My blog traffic is generally quite low from what I can fathom. I won’t let this phase me though, as it’s all a learning curve.

  • December saw 789 views / 221 visitors
  • January saw 799 views / 207 visitors
  • February has seen 383 views / 120 visitors to date.
  • I have published 52 posts.
  • I have no idea how much time I spend on blogging per week, but I imagine it’s probably nowhere near enough to have it running as effectively as it could.
Lessons learned

My take-home thoughts from these reflections are that:

  1. I need to be a lot more organised. Generally in my day-to-day life I am fairly well-organised. Blog-wise, I may have attempted to write as much as possible, to review as many toys as I could, without being as selective as I should have. In addition, I have also neglected the technical side, as I mentioned above. I really need to read ‘Blogging for Dummies’ (if it exists), asap!
  2. I’ve realised it’s important to network and interact with other bloggers more than I do. I am not an island, so this is necessary to share ideas and feedback, as well as keep my awareness of current sex toys and blog topics up-to-date.
  3. Affiliation with big companies is ok as an add-on, and can be a benefit if you’re looking to expand your toy collection and get some commission back in return. But unless your following is huge, affiliate links are probably just not going to be fruitful. I’ve undoubtedly spent more time than perhaps sensible trying to add affiliate links on review posts and Twitter timeline. This time on reflection, would have perhaps been spent more wisely on learning the dreaded technical stuff and doing more research for blog content / reviews.

I’ve pondered enough, so all that remains is to get on with it. Thanks for joining me on the journey so far. I hope you’ll continue to stop by and take in the ‘scenery’ from time to time!

Oh and if anyone has Blogging for Dummies, perhaps they could loan it to me 😛

Cheers my dears,

Luv bunny  xx

 

 

My (not-so) Secret Obsession

The scent of a Bunny with a penchant for sex toys

I have a bottle of Calvin Klein Secret Obsession, which has lasted absolutely ages. I mean a couple of years ‘ages’. And it made me think; am I obsessed with sex toys? I’m pretty sure I am, but hopefully in a non-intrusive nor life-destroying way. Well, as long as I don’t run out of cupboard space, this fascination for toys should not become intrusive! I like to think of it as a relatively ‘healthy’ obsession. After all, it gives me pleasure trying new toys. If I get my endorphins going, then for a time I will be easier to live with. Poor Mr Bunny and my other family have to endure my stress-head rants on numerous occasions! And there are far worse things to be obsessed about; my weight, for example (that could be damaging). A person (that would be stalker-y and so not cool). My bank balance (money, or a lack of lots of it, whilst important and a necessity, will not define me).

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But this obsession of mine isn’t really that secret…I mean obviously the companies that sell me these toys know, and my husband knows I buy far too many of them, as do readers of this blog. But as that bottle of perfume goes to show, this enjoyment of my toys will last for ages, and if it makes me happy then so be it!

Waxing lyrical about candle play


Recently I persuaded Mr Bunny to let me get the bondage candles out for an evening of sensory playtime. The five senses are an all-important part of foreplay and sexual stimulation. Touch can be gentle like a stroke or caress. Alternatively, it can be sharp, causing mild-moderate pain. There are various ways to stimulate a partner to illicit a pain response. Pinwheels, molten wax, impact play and electro-stimulation can be experimented with, according to what interests you both. In this session, I desired the anticipatory stings of heated wax.

Lighting the wick of desire

I put on sexy lacy pants and a lacy halter-neck bra, then sauntered down to our lounge, candles in hand. After arranging a nice padded cushion on the floor and lying a towel over it, I proceeded to lie on my front. He removed my bra to save it from the wax and lit the candle. Carefully, he held it a safe distance from my skin, allowing drips of molten wax to gravitate onto my back. Another target was the landing strip formed by my shoulder blades. Pretty purple sploshes solidified on their resting places. I hissed in anticipatory surprise as the heated wax blobs rained down on me in quick succession. 1…2…3…4…5- I lost count as I breathed through the sensory explosion I was experiencing.

The painter becomes painted

Then we swapped places and it was my turn to use him as my own canvas. He exclaimed in surprise as he felt the pitter patter of molten wax, and inwardly I smiled as my inner Domme took her pleasure from his squirms. I found I enjoyed being in control as much, if not more than being the recipient. The sadistic side of me liked peeling the solid wax off of his bare chest, and I look forward to repeating this experience soon!