It’s been absolutely ages since I joined in with the Quote Quest meme. I can’t believe it’s already at week 29. Looking back at the most recent #QuoteQuest post I wrote, I saw some hope back then that I may invent a new me. The past few months have left me feeling a bit jaded though.
I started my new role as a carer in October. Already it feels like the ‘honeymoon’ period is over, and I find myself questioning “is this something I could do long-term?” It feels like 2020 was a bleak year for a lot of people. Maybe my current melancholy is down to the weather being miserable, and the continuing lock-down situation in the UK.
But I do also feel like there’s an element of ground-hog day involved in being a carer. I’m seeing more regular clients now, and I try to remain as light and cheery as possible when I’m visiting them. Some of them seem really lonely and glad of the company. I can handle those clients alright because I don’t mind chatting.
One thing I find really frustrating though is the stubbornness of a number of my clients. Some of them refuse to wash, and there are those who have serious health conditions, but they seem to enjoy exacerbating them. They make excuses such as ‘I’m not hungry now’ (they’re diabetic and yet they have chocolate wrappers left around their home). I know that I can’t change these people. Maybe they’re happy living the way they do. Perhaps they don’t really want a carer there at all.
But for now, I treat each day as a new beginning and hope that whatever I’ve done for a client, it’s half an hour they felt was worth waking up for. If I think about my role that way, I can convince myself to continue with it. Now that I have 359 blank pages left in that 365-page book, my page for tomorrow reads something like, “make time to spend at least 30 minutes doing something for yourself. That way, you might be a little less jaded than you felt yesterday.”
I do like the colour jade, mind you, 😉