A common fantasy for many couples is to invite a third person to play with them. But for a lot of couples the idea remains just that. There are several reasons why the fantasy may go unfulfilled. There may be trouble with identifying a suitable third party, whether they are male or female. It might be the case that the couple are concerned about damage to their relationship. Jealousy, feelings of inadequacy or guilt are possible outcomes of involving a third person in the bedroom. Then there are the details to think about; where should the play be instigated? In the couples’ home, in a hotel or in a ‘club’ environment? What will the third person be able to do with each partner of the couple, and how can play revolve around each person ‘equally’ so that no one feels overlooked?
Toys Toys Toys
One way of circumventing all these issues, is to use a toy instead of including a third person. A suction-cup dildo or strap-on harness secured to a piece of furniture can become the extra ‘male’ for a MMF scenario; this way the female in the couple gets to experience two orifices being filled at once. She can either have the dildo in her vagina, and thrust on it whilst performing oral sex on her partner, or she could experience double penetration, taking her partner’s penis in either her vagina or anus, whilst the toy is used in the other opening.
When it is time to ‘return the favour,’ and play out the FFM scenario, the male in the couple could either use a masturbator to stimulate his penis, whilst giving oral sex to his partner, or he could take a dildo in his anus during penetrative sex with his lover. Another variation is to have his partner ‘peg’ him (perform anal sex on him with a strap-on dildo or a strapless one such as a Realdoe or Feeldoe), whilst using a an oral sex simulator at the same time. Thus it seems a threesome could be easily turned into a reality, by using toys in the bedroom.
Role play fantasies
For other adventurous play, costumes can be worn and props can be included to create a ‘scene.’ For example, some common role-plays are:
- teacher / student
- nurse / patient
- boss / employee
- housewife / workman
- two strangers in a bar.
Costumes can either be purchased ready-to-wear, or improvised with your own clothes. In most of the scenarios mentioned above, there is ‘Dominant and submissive’ interplay. One role-play I tried with Mr Bunny previously was that of the ‘sexy cop’ and defendant. I purchased the Music Legs cop costume (now discontinued), which consists of dress and belt, hat, truncheon, cuffs and cop’s badge.
The dress is good, though it definitely requires the belt to cinch in the waist. The hat was pleasing too, and made a handy makeshift ‘blindfold.’ The accessories were very cheap though; the baton felt like it would crush very easily, and the handcuffs were plastic and very flimsy. I did not bother with them, instead using the Lovehoney Tease Me set I already owned.
I got dressed up, complete with fishnet stockings and suspender belt, and wore my suede boots too. Mr Bunny grinned when he saw me. Though I soon wiped the cheekiness from his face as I made my ‘arrest,’ then interrogated him thoroughly. We then went on to enjoy some of the hottest sex we’d had in ages. He certainly was stimulated by his ‘arrest,’ while I enjoyed playing the bad cop!
Fun without costumes
It is not necessary to wear a costume, to partake in some Dominant / submissive interplay. Moreover, if you don’t feel comfortable playing a character, props such as ties and blindfolds can be an effective way for a Dominant to take control, while the submissive yields to their Master or Mistress. A nice beginners Tie and Tease set is available for a reasonable price.
By fulfilling our fantasies and enjoying a varied sex life, we enrich our relationships and improve intimacy. Besides, if something doesn’t work out quite how we envisaged, there are opportunities for laughing about it together, which also strengthens the bond between couples.